Crushing

– Nani, when are they going to start crushing?

– Very soon, Emma, very soon.

Maheen was able to confirm this information with the utmost certainty to her three and a half year old granddaughter because for the second time in twice that many days the Nani (known for No Naps) had watched this particular movie.

The Karate Kid.

The 2010 version with Jackie Chan and Jaden Smith that takes place in China and culminates in a massive kung fu tournament at the end.

I happened upon the film several months ago when it was playing on one of the two dozen premium cable channels we subscribe to, and ever since that day, every time I notice that it appears on the program guide, I like to watch it.

Regardless of what part is on at the time.

Such were the situations when Nani was over.

She would patiently explain to Emma what was transpiring during each scene while I grinned from ear to ear on my recliner at the two of them.

At last the tournament began and The Bug got to see some crushing.

-Mommy, when can I take karate lessons?

-When you’re older, Emma, when you’re older.

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Bursting the Bieber Bubble

Sunday evening around seven, seven thirty or so, the three youngest Picetti’s were hanging together in the family room.

My neck was sore from watching football and football related programming since nine in the AM. Fehmeen must have sensed that my fantasy team was losing because she offered to massage my neck for the duration of three Zac Brown Band songs.

Always the nimble negotiator, Emma inserted her voice into the convo and suggested that we listen (and dance) to the musical stylings of Justin Bieber.

I nodded my head as if my neck didn’t hurt to let Fehmeen know where my loyalties were lying for the evening’s soundtrack. She smiled the ‘of course you’re going to agree with anything your daughter says’ kind of smile as she loaded the disc into the player.

Emma started moving and grooving the second the familiar Whoa Oooh Oooh introductory refrains of the lead track Baby.

After the second chorus and sometime before the Ludacris rapping section, Emma put this little gem out there: “I really like her voice!”

My wife and I looked at each other and Fehmeen informed our not even three-and-a-half year old little girl that the sweet sounding soprano voice she loved to sing along with belonged to a boy.

Her response was simply: “No, Mama.”

She came around a bit when Fehmeen showed Justin’s picture from the cd case and by the time track two began it was pretty much a non-issue for her…

…as it was for me. The massage lasted almost eight songs. You go, Justin(e) Bieber.

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Field Trip to The City

The Picetti clan, minus Fehmeen (who was teaching) and plus Julian (who is our caregiver and BoostMaster), took a field trip up to the California Academy of Sciences in San Francisco this morning.

Earlier this summer we saw a commercial advertising the lizards and snakes exhibit there and we knew immediately that it would be right up Emma’s alley. Fehmeen purchased tickets in June but I wasn’t feeling well at the time we originally planned to go. And then two months later the summer and the exhibit are almost over…

Anyway.

The first thing Emma saw as we rolled in was the Tyrannosaurus Rex fossils in the main entryway. “Dinosaur,” she kept saying as she pointed up to it from her stroller. It should be noted that we had just watched the T Rex scene in Jurassic Park not even three days ago.

Our first stop was on the second floor for the aforementioned lizards and snakes extravaganza. Thankfully we had arrived early enough in the day so we had a practically unobstructed view of each one of the reptiles behind the plexiglass. I think Emma enjoyed the iguana most of all, in part because she saw it yawning, and because it has a cool sounding name.

We then visited the rain forest. Seriously. It was amazing to experience that kind of tropical ecosystem in Golden Gate Park. There were giant blue parrots, more snakes and lizards, and even hundreds of butterflies fluttering around. Thank goodness we forgot my Giants wearable blanket in the van because it was hotter than heck in there.

The next port of call was the aquarium. Lots of Emma jawdrops in this room. Especially notable was the large sea turtle and the gigantic catfish that practically swam up to Emma in the tunnel tank. She also liked touching the starfish and seaweed.

We tried to stick around for the Snakes of the Bay Area presentation but were collectively underwhelmed by the educators excessive verbosity and adamant no touching the snakes policy. Basically, we were hungry for lunch.

Except for me. I had a Boost before they started the show.

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Luke Puked

It was with equal parts of terror and amusement did Emma bear witness to her swimming lesson partner’s throwing up in the pool yesterday.

Apparently, the young lad took on a little too much water while floating on his back. The coughs came first, which were followed by a few dry heaves, and then it was showtime.

He barfed in the pool and on the deck and on his swimsuit.

During the whole affair Emma gleefully recounted to everyone within earshot the one and only time she upchucked in her life — it was while she was sleeping in bed and involved chili.

And before you get to feeling sorry for the young master Luke, he was back in the pool not five minutes after it happened.

I doubt that would have been the case if he would have dropped a floater in there.

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The Caption Contest poll has been added to the previous post. Scroll down or go here to vote for your favorite.

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Introductions Are in Order

As a result of a hastily called family meeting and a nearly unanimous, bipartisan vote, we, The Picettis, have decided to allow Emma to get her first pet.

So, it was late Thursday morning that mother and daughter returned home with Lady Ballerina.

Lady Ballerina is a small, purple betta fish who, so far, seems quite content to take it as easy as possible.

Not one to be deterred by her new pet’s lackadaisical attitude towards swimming around the old bowl, Emma is transfixed by the fact that LB not only doesn’t finish all of her dinner but also poops as well. It’s all that she can talk about.

Welcome to the family, little fishie!

Not the actual LB -- named for Lady Gaga and Angelina Ballerina -- this is just the first picture of a purple betta I found.

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Darpook No More

Before heading off to getting stretched by Robin and Lindsey at physical therapy yesterday, I got to see my little girl have her weekly swimming lesson.

According to reports from the front lines, the first few weeks were pretty rough. Body as stiff as driftwood while on her back, the chlorinated water was extra salty on account of all of Emma’s tears.

Then the news started filtering in that she was swimming with an invigorated sense of confidence. Gone was the crying, replaced instead by laughter and smiles.

I knew that I had to see it for myself.

I watched my little girl floating around the pool with Teacher Andrew, kicking her legs and moving her arms. I was amazed at how easily she held her breath when she was submerged and pushed towards the pool’s edge. I was thrilled every time she stood up and jumped to Andrew before they took a lap around the track.

I have never been so proud of my Emma as I was yesterday.

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Skinning the Cat

Before you get crazy and call the fine folks over at PETA or at your local SPCA about the title of this post, keep in mind that I accompanied Emma (and Fehmeen) to her Junior Gym class yesterday.

Usually parents are required to sit behind the glass in the lobby in order to watch their kids tumble and jump, but since rules rarely apply to me, we were invited by Teacher Justin to check out class from inside the gym.

It’s an interesting experience to watch and listen to your kid interact with other kids and authority figures. It didn’t come as too big a surprise to see that Emma was definitely the most talkative student in class. She also led the group in requests for teacher assistance. Again, not really shocking.

Based upon what I saw, I think that she has the least amount of experience doing this kind of coordinated movement — balance beam crossing, parallel bar crab and bear walking, downhill ramp somersaulting, and even the aforementioned skinning of the cat on the lower uneven bar — compared with the other four kids in her class.

To his credit, Teacher Justin individualized tasks and routines for every student based upon their already acquired skills and areas that need improvement. Everyone had a good time practicing their moves on the various apparati — except for the little guy who decided against participating with the rest of the group and was asked to exit the gym until such a time when he had a change in attitude.

Apparently, he left the building not soon after departing the workout area, mumbling something about rotten orange slices and stale animal crackers.

The hour flew by like fifty minutes and as they filed into the lobby, each kid got a stamp for their hands. They were all excited to receive their little splotch of colored ink for the day and they left the premises happy and seemingly eager to return next week.

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Senses

The only thing better than having Emma sit next to me on my recliner when we watch Beauty and the Beast or Tangled or Up together while she makes short work of an ice-cold grape popsicle is when she eats fluffy microwave popcorn from an ornately decorative San Francisco Giants souvenir cup from Opening Day of the 2011 season. Even though the BiPap mask is covering my mouth and nose, I can smell the salty popped kernel scent as clearly as I can hear her teeth crunching down on each and every morsel of the lightly salted snack food. And from her perch atop the recliner’s armrest, I can feel every ounce of her thirty-five pounds leaning up against me and it’s the best feeling in the world.

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Our Little Dance Machine

Emma has a serious case of Dance Fever!

Major props to Dan for converting my old tapes into mp3s.

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So Sweet the Sound

Not many things can top sharing a recliner with your daughter as she eats a popsicle and sings along to Beauty and the Beast while attached to your BiPap.

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