We’re Never Too Busy For Your Referral

I have a cousin named Matt P^&*%. Well, technically, he’s not really my cousin, we were close family friends growing up, and throughout the years we just got into the habit of calling each other cousin. Our families would eat Mexican food at La Pinata in Burlingame and vacation together every summer in Lake Tahoe. Matt and I were witness to the Billy Mitchell Clown Alley Ketchup Incident in San Francisco and I was there when Matt inserted himself onto the San Bruno High School Social Scene’s A List by hosting the infamous Toga Party of 1986 at his parents’ house (which caused tens of thousands of dollars in property and structural damage).

For as long as I’ve known Matt, he has had the singular dream of someday owning his own casino. Since the day we met, the idea of being the next Bill Harrah, Steve Winn, or Donald Trump has always appealed to him. Along the still-continuing voyage to eventual gaming establishment proprietorship, he has worked at the Pacific Stock Exchange in San Francisco, he’s been an apartment manager in Las Vegas, and he has worked in the real estate business.

Although we haven’t kept in close, personal contact in recent years, my wife and I do receive a monthly newsletter from Matt. The interesting thing about this newsletter is that every month the items being sold or the services being promoted are completely different and absolutely unrelated and totally random. One month, it’s feng shui that’s being hocked and the next month, it’s all about refinancing your home loan. Despite being unique month after month, there is one phrase that appears on every single piece of correspondence and it is this: “We’re never too busy for your referral.” I realize that this quote is a company slogan much like, “I’m lovin’ it” or “Don’t let the smooth taste fool ya”, but it’s inclusion on the bottom of the twelve times per year missive never fails to elicit from me a chuckle. Every month I would look forward to receiving and reading the letter that concluded with the line, “We’re never too busy for your referral.” Ha, ha, ha. Giggle, giggle, snort. Hee, hee.

So, you can imagine my disappointment this month when his newsletter did not contain the words, “We’re never too busy for your referral.” I was so broken up about the situation that I initially refused to read the letter. That is until my wife excitedly brought the letter to me one and exclaimed, “You HAVE to read this!”

I responded with, “Why bother? There’s no referral line, what’s the point?”

And she said, “Just read it, okay?”

And so I did. And now you can, as well.

August 1, 2008

Dear Friend,

I hope this letter finds you and your loved ones in good spirits.

During my business day, I often have requests from my clients for referrals to professional trades and services – everything from painters to attorneys.

As part of my ongoing Client Appreciation Program, I will sometimes send you a letter endorsing a particularly good trade or service provider my clients and I have found to be of tremendous value.

One such referral is Matt P^&*% of M______ 2 L______. He has been my Loan Officer for the past 20 years and he is superb at what he does! That’s right, I do home loans as well as real estate. FHA, VA and conventional home loans.

If you, a friend, or family member need the help of a good loan officer, Matt P^&*% can be reached at:

Sincerely,

Matt P^&*%

Apparently, Matt’s not too busy for his own referral, either.

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